A Handsome Laundrette, a Box of Lovers and Two Dozen Happy Seacows

A Call for Submissions.

Have you been writing stories for years in abject squalor, perhaps in
a small room above a dirty store full of hamburgers and no buns, never
ever any buns?

Have your stories been stolen by an angry buzzard and returned with
great holes in them that were not there before, probably?

Have you been waiting and waiting and waiting for an anthology of
stories which explore the magical, bewildering, even muddled world of
un-realism?? ?

Then look no further, or indeed, do look, at the following words
[note: edit this sentence later]

A Handsome Laundrette, a Box of Lovers and Two Dozen Happy Seacows is
looking for stories or an experimental, odd, or surreal nature, WITH
WHICH TO FILL ITS OWN ANTHOLOGOUS BELLY!

You too can be part of its digestive majesty.

BUT HOW??

AHLABOLATDFHS, to its friends, is open to submissions throughout the
month of July, that preposterous month fast approaching.

YOU WANT MORE DETAILS?:

Stories: Up to 5000 words
Publication: Via the magic of Internet PDF.
Payment: $50 (Australian)
Turnaround: Two months maximum.
Format: Rtf attachment. Email to moonlighttuber@ gmail.com
No reprints.

AHLABOLATDFHS is open to writers of all varied nations, but is
particularly interested in publishing Australian writers and funny
dogs.

To Arms, My Jolly Breathren!

The Seacows are (metaphorically) in your hands…

http://moonlighttub er.wordpress. com/2009/ 06/29/submission s-open-for- moonlight- tubers-first- e-anthology/

Love Is the Theme

Since I didn't find an anthology to highlight today, here is a free writing contest.

Writing Sprint 3: Deadline - February 6, 2009

Challenge: Love is a theme which fuels many popular stories and novels. Writing about love can also be difficult. For this challenge, write a story about two long lost lovers who are suddenly reunited. The story should be between 500-2,000 words.

To enter, post your piece during the sprint period and include the tags Long Lost Love (entered as long_lost_love).

The entries will be judged on originality and poignancy. Make us experience what the reunited couple are feeling and do it in a way that is genuine and unforced.

Awards:

* The winner of each weekly competition will receive $30.

Submit online.

Rules and Regulartions

Writing Calamities

We're looking for wacky, unbelievable, and/or humorous stories! What's the wildest writer-related experience you've ever had? Crack us up! Awe us! Please sum up your submission with a one-sentence lesson or quote.

Submission Guidelines

All stories must be true and about you or someone you know. Reprints are acceptable but please tell us when and where your story was printed.

Submissions must be between 750 - 1,500 words. Any submissions that do not meet the word count requirement will be deleted immediately.

Please include the following with your submission:

• your full name (or pen name - please specify)
• address
• email address
• phone number
• story title
• word count
• your bio
• the book title you are submitting to

Send your submissions to: writersguide@writergazette.com. Please make the subject line match the book title that you are submitting to. All submissions must be pasted into the body of your email - absolutely no attachments. Emails with attachments will be immediately deleted.

Please note: it may take up to a year for us to respond to your submission. Thank you for your patience with us as we review submissions.

There is no deadline to submit for these books at this time as we are considering future volumes for each themed book.

Payment Upon Publishing: At this time we can pay CDN$15 per submission with your full bio and a free copy of the ebook. We are paying via PayPal and by cheque (CDN funds). It is our intent to increase the payment amount in the future when possible. If you do not agree to these payment terms, please do not submit.

Rights: We require one time rights and editing rights (if needed). You retain all copyrights. Upon acceptance of your submission, we will send you publication contract and a copy of your formatted story. This form must be signed and returned in order for your submission to be published in our series. Upon acceptance of your submission, you hereby grant Topzone Publishing/Krista Barrett the right to publish and reproduce your submission in book form or any other media form that may result from publication worldwide.

Disclaimer: We have the right to refuse any and all submissions that we believe will not fit with the theme of our books.

About Us: Krista Barrett, owner of Writer Gazette, Writers Manual and EbooksCafe, is the running force behind this new book series. Books will be available in electronic and printed formats.

The Mission for this book series:

• To provide encouragement and inspiration to writers worldwide.
• To provide a new market for writers worldwide

Greeting Card Writings and Anthology

Blue Mountain Arts is interested in reviewing writings that would be appropriate for publication on our greeting cards. We are looking for highly original submissions on friendship, family, special occasions, and positive living. We pay $300 per poem for all rights to publish it on a greeting card and $50 if your poem is used only in an anthology. Please note that we do not accept rhyming poetry.

To request a copy of our writer's guidelines, please send a blank email to writings@sps.com with "Send Me Guidelines" in the subject line.

To submit your work, send to editorial@sps.com (no attachments, please) or write to us at:

Blue Mountain Arts, Inc.
Editorial Department
Post Office Box 1007
Boulder, CO 80306

PMS—Poison, Murder, Satisfaction!!

SUBMISSION GUIDELINES - Are you writing what we want to read?

Are you ready to show off your red-hot talent? Are you ready to see your manuscripts for sale in both Print and Electronic Book formats? Here's that to send to the L&L Dreamspell Submission desk!

Romance - Make us wish we were part of the story, with interesting, intelligent characters. All varieties accepted. (Please make sure Historical romances are factually correct.)

Mystery - From Mainstream to Cozies to Hardboiled, we want to appeal to a wide audience of mystery lovers. Chapter 1 should really grab the reader's attention!

Suspense - From Mystery to Romance to Thrillers and Horror. Make us really feel what the characters experience.

Paranormal - FICTION - Ghosts, Vampires, the Occult - all within fascinating, original stories including elements of Suspense, Mystery and/or any type of Romance. NON-FICTION - Interesting, thought-provoking manuscripts with theories and/or true life experiences.

Metaphysical--NON-FICTION--Anything and everything within the "New Age" genre. Interesting, thought-provoking manuscripts with theories and/or true life experiences. Readers should be fascinated with your ideas/theories on ESP/Intuition, Synchronicity, Divination, Dreams, Healing, Meditation, Angels, Yoga, Crystals, and speculation about Reality and Quantum Physics.

Not Sure?--If you didn't see a category above that matches, but think your manuscript/story would fit in at L&L Dreamspell please write to the Publishing Desk and ask - Click HERE (QUESTIONS ONLY - NO SUBMISSIONS TO THIS EMAIL)

What to submit...

E-MAILED SUBMISSIONS ONLY! Please do not send submissions to our P.O. Box - Thanks!

Short Stories - Send us the completed story. The length should be between 3000 and 9000 words, more or less. NOTE - Please tell us the story is for PMS—Poison, Murder, Satisfaction!! in your submission e-mail! If you have any questions about submitting a short story please write to the Publishing desk before you send it (NO previously published stories) - Click HERE (QUESTIONS ONLY - NO SUBMISSIONS TO THIS EMAIL)

Important! Prepare your submission before you send it! - Click HERE for instructions

WTF - Mysteries

A true writing challenge!

I want your tales of mystery for a new anthology to be published in late 2009. I am looking for stories in the mystery genre. Here is the catch - No cussing! With a title like WTF, what do we mean no cussing? That is exactly what we mean! What we are looking for is the best euphemism(s) you can write. Your story should have a stunning WTF moment and the best WTF euphemism you can write. Example: "What the fine, flying, feathered, four-eyed frogs is going on in here?" You get the idea. Please do not make references to or use characters from other known sources. I will only accept unpublished, original works, characters, and story lines.

Please include on the front page of your manuscript:

• Name (and pen name, if you desire)
• Address
• Phone Number
• E-mail Address
• Number of words (limit 9,000)

Submissions should be made in standard double-spaced manuscript format. Stories can be e-mailed to request@kerlak.com as a MS Word .doc or .rtf (Rich Text Format) attachment.

Deadline for submissions is 4/30/2009. If your story is selected, you will be contacted by 6/30/2009. Paper submissions will not be returned.

If your story is selected for publication, payment will be $20.00 U.S. upon release of the book. We will also award a $50.00 bonus for the best WTF phrase as chosen by the editor(s).

Hard-copy manuscripts should be accompanied by a digital copy in .doc or .rtf format sent on a 3.5-inch floppy disk or CD. Stories should be sent to:

WTF Submissions
Mark Fitzgerald, Editor
c/o Kerlak Publishing
1779-1 Kirby Parkway, #373
Memphis, TN 38138

For any additional questions, please contact me at request@kerlak.com